Advice column One

1. “I have a crush on my best guy friend of almost 6 years. I haven’t seen him in over a year. I want to tell him I like him but I don’t know how. What should I do?”
   
2. “Should I tell my crush I like them even though I know neither of us are in the space for a relationship?”

Hello readers,

Both of these questions are pretty similar, so I’m going to address them together.

First of all, I want to establish that you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. There’s a social stigma that people are obligated to tell people they like that they, well, like them, and the truth is you never have to do that. You should not feel guilty for keeping your feelings to yourself. They are yours, after all, so do with them as you please.

That being said, Reader 2, I believe before you make a decision you should figure out what you want. If you want nothing to change, then the best way to do so is say nothing. However, if you want them to know, then telling them becomes more important. A confession will likely bring about change (not necessarily a relationship—this could just mean acknowledgment), so if you want that, telling them would probably be the right choice.Change is not always a bad thing. People think that interest in someone will automatically make things weird or awkward, but if you don’t treat it as such then it doesn’t have to be.

For Reader 1, I suggest you consider the above. If you really do want to tell him, then we can move on to methods. These will depend on how close you and your friend live to each other. Of course, it would be nicer to tell him in person, especially since you haven’t seen each other in so long, but that isn’t always possible. In terms of a long distance friendship, you could go anywhere from a super romantic letter confession to a teary-eyed FaceTime to a quick text. It’s most important to think about your comfort level. That being said, it is going to be scary, but you want to share this part of yourself with your best friend, and that should be something you enjoy and are proud of.

I hope this answered your questions. I’m here all week, so please send me more.

Signed,
The Counsel/Advice Dean (CAD)