Club Fair, Spring 2020

As per tradition, the first week of spring semester ended with an absolutely banging club fair.

Actually, I lied. It was kind of lame. Compared to the past three Simon’s Rock club fairs I have attended, this one was the least busy in terms of not only the clubs available, but also the quantity of attendees. However, Brandon Pare (RD of Dolliver) pumped out some stinking rad tunes from the APC speaker, so that kind of made up for it.
As has become a tradition/responsibility of the Cad, our staffers (me) travelled throughout the bustling fair to collect statements from the talented club-provider(s) of the semester. They are featured below.

Simon’s Rock Staples:
Dorissa Tyndall, Freshman Class Representative, says that “Student Government is looking to fill positions for Junior and Senior Class Reps, as well as representatives of the CEI Bias Response Team and the Programming Procedures Committee. If interested in any of these positions, please either send an email to council@ or come tell us! We meet at 3:45 every Wednesday in Sprague and all students are welcome!”
Justice Bowman (one of three resident Owls) explains CEI as the “Council for Equity and Inclusion” and opens it to “all students to feel included and welcomed on campus.”
Akarsh Balaji and Izzi Cho fronted the International Club stand. They left me this very cryptic message: “We do the food in hall of food. We cater for w2 doc official for kid from other country. Come AND AUDITION for cultural talent show (March 1). 100% we know what we are doing. Peace. Y’all prolly know who wrote the first two sentences.”
Do you ever get the urge to just be nice? Isabel West asks you to “Come spread positivity and share your ideas for events to brighten the community and make someone’s day better” in Random Acts of Kindness Club.
The Weekly Cad (us) is the coolest club on campus. “Get Involved” here.

Student Unions:
“The Black Student Union is a student run organization for all walks of the African Diaspora. Regular meetings are for afro-descent identifying individuals,” says Kayo Dehinbo.
Justice Bowman is the founder of a new student union, LOWFI: “Low Income First-Gen Students Club is for all students and is a place to welcome students of this demographic to this college.”
Carson Stone and Samantha Statter are on the same track, founding the long-anticipated JSU (we miss you Ziv), saying, “The Jewish Student Union is a safe space for Jews to connect with each other, an advocacy group for Jewish issues on campus, and will also run Jewish cultural events to get closer with and share our culture.”
Additionally, Simon’s Rock has a South Asian Student Association, led by Haseeb Hamza. Unfortunately, he was unavailable for contact, but the sign said that this is a club for South Asian students, and it occasionally hosts events for South Asian allies.

General Recreation:
If you haven’t had to reschedule a meeting due to one peers’ conflicts due to this club, you haven’t studied at Simon’s Rock. Moxie Rudder says, “DND [Dungeons and Dragons] is a low stakes way to make friends and have a good time outside of classes. I’ve made some of my best friends here, and I would highly recommend the club for anyone new to SRC! Also, you can eat slime that turns you into a zombie. Who wouldn’t want to do that?!”
Monk Schane-Lydon, beloved professor, presented Rocker Motorcycle Club. “We take things apart, fix em, and make things go. What’s cooler than that?”
If art is more your thing, Juliana Oliver has just the club for you. “Bob Ross Club is an art therapy club centered around the videos of the legendary Bob Ross! Here, you can either follow his painting videos or create whatever you want as a way to break from studying. No prior experience is required and all materials are provided!”
Not into painting? Elizabeth Estrada is founding Pots and Thoughts, (which should not be confused with the more common SR tradition of Pot and Thots). Anyway, “If you like ceramics or have no idea what it is that’s great! Try out Ceramics Club. It’s for folks that just want to learn something new with some friends and chill people. All materials are provided!!!”
Rumor has it that Carla Hamida and Estella Lumer have written an intense statement advertising Fashion Club to the masses, but alas, the statement never found itself in my Warlock inbox. Join Fashion Club. They do fashion shows and shoots and things. 
Hiking Club (of Olivia Dale and Brianna Walters) is exactly what it sounds like: “Want to have fun relieving stress and seeing beautiful places off campus? Come on hikes no matter your skill level!”
Olivia is super busy with the environment. She cares about it so much that she is founding the Invasive Species Removal Club. Here, you can “make the Simon’s Rock campus a more beautiful place—all the while helping the environment, and hanging out with your friends. Come tackle the invasive plants taking on our campus!”
If you’re into sports, join Amanda Bury, Jordan Popov, Charlotte Epstein, and Susie Baek on the Fencing Team. They “provide a coach, gear and professional instruction. It’s really fun!”
We know that metal swords don’t strike everyone’s fancy, so Samarth Agnihotri offers a padded alternative. In his words, “Boffing exists.”
Nine Reed-Mera, Alex Coleman, and Dan Harris say, “Now that we’ve captured your attention, come capture this flag. It’s the best club, and it’s low commitment and highly competitive. Thank you.”
This isn’t exactly a sport, but I bet Kai Dai and Jesus Alcazar would claim it as one. Join Simon’s Rock League of Legends. “Let’s make GLHF true again.”

​Education & Politics:
Kairo Baylor describes Pre-Med Society as “a club that provides support and advice for those interested in any type of medicine.”
Iman Anwarzai from Women in Tech says that “Women in Tech was created to be a community for people to come together to build, to code, to collaborate, and to learn. Women in Tech is an inclusive community open to everyone.” 
“Want to save lives? Cool, so do we,” says Christian Ventura, poster boy of SREMS (Simon’s Rock Emergency Medical Services), the campus emergency medicine training program. “Check your email to sign up to join the team. Limited seats remain :)”
Aung Sett Kyaw of Philosophy Club asks “Are you ready to THINK at the expense of everything else?”
If you’ve met Matin Yazdi, you probably already know about this club, but we’re going to include his statement anyway: “Want to know more about Persian culture? Want to learn something new about a country with a 2500 year history? The first empire of the world? Or maybe you’re interested in learning Farsi…  If you were interested in a single word I said, the Iranian and Persian Language and Culture Club is for you. We are going to watch world-class Iranian movies and learn about Iranian cultures, enjoy delicious cuisines, and have open discussions about modern Iranian society.”
Ervin Brown explained Biology Club with a big smile, exclaiming that, “Everyone can join! We won’t have many meetings but there will be a campus-wide Bio/Chem trivia tournament with a fifty dollar first prize, and there are plans for a beach or NYC trip to see a famous scientist, such as Bill Nye.
Oliver Wolf and Patrick Madaus, leaders of Organize for Bernie Sanders, simply explained their mission as “We’re organizing to get out the vote for Bernie Sanders.”
Chance Reeves, famous Bard Academy at Simon’s Rock political organizer, explained that “Sunrise at Simon's Rock is part of the nationwide Sunrise Movement to stop climate change at the legislative level. This semester we plan to participate in the global strikes for climate action and campaign for real change from governing officials.”
So that’s all we’ve got. Get out and expand that social life of yours, or dedicate all of your time to a single musical and a newspaper like I do. Here’s to a great Spring semester.

Elise Kelly

Elise Kelly is a sophomore at Simon's Rock and The Weekly Cad's President and Director of Creative Publications.